Job Hunting

I have sent out eleven applications over the past two days. I'm pretty happy with myself! For a while I was not interested in applying for anything and felt like all my ambition was being sucked out of me and told myself that time would cure any motivation I was lacking. I told myself it was because I was not exactly sure what I wanted to do. But I have decided that sitting at home wondering what to do with my life is a complete waste of time, whereas working at a decent job and wondering what to do with my life while I work is better. John really helped me get back on my feet and was really supportive while I verbally vomited all of my concerns and frustrations about how lost and confused I felt. I still sort of feel woe-is-me but with a little bit more of my old ambition back and much needed confidence endorsed by my husband.

Today I was offered an interview. Although it is the third interview offered to me, I consider it my first "real" offer. The first un-real (?) offer was a great opportunity to work in "my field" but I turned the interview down as I did not know much about the candidate and did not want to support a platform I did not know much about - especially when I would be working within my own community.

The second interview, which I should hear back about this week, was for an internship with a dance company preparing press releases and finding funding. But it is unpaid - so boo to that. It would be a good experience and it is only five hours a week, so I would definitely take it. But I need something that pays. Luckily that is what this job I have an interview for tomorrow does.

I am nervous though as the closest I have ever been to the finance/business industry was when I took international business four years ago where everything I learned was incredibly basic - and I am not even sure I remember anything from it. I also had a personal finance course that I dreaded! It was all so incredibly dry, except for the finance game we played. I did however enjoy my calculus business course and thought that derivatives and integrals were fun. I do not know if this is the right job for me, but I do enjoy research in general - is that odd? I wish I could say what kind of research I enjoy, but in each job that I have had I always enjoyed the part where I searched and gathered information.

I still plan to pursue the dancing thing, but a work/study opportunity that I was excited about has now left my mind completely after a phone call with a truly heinous woman the other day. I should have taken heed as I was told by six of her own employees that she was a woman to be dealt with. If anything I was irritated at how she wasted my time by even calling me to "see if I had any questions" or if I wanted to schedule an interview. She framed her questions and answers in a way so that I would have to beg her for the position. But after to talking to other dancers in the city there are just as good, if not better work/study positions available at other studios. I hope it's true. After that, I do not know where to even begin.