27 January 2011

Attention Monger

This is a general breakdown of how Spartacus, our dog, spends his day:

45% Sleeping

5% Strange activities done while we are asleep and random barking

50% Whining for the following:
- 1% A walk
- 44% What we are eating
- 5% To Play
- 50% No apparent reason,
which could amount to the following:
to lick our ears
to chew on dirty tissues (John is sick)
to lay on top of the coffee table
to have your attention
to be picked up
to have any packaging in your hand

I feel bad complaining about him. But I'm irritable. And he's been whining so much! Plus, John has the flu. And whining is not cute, no matter how you put it. His whining starts quiet, almost indiscernible and lasts to the point where you almost forget (like background noise), then it grows in volume and pitch until it gets to the point where it sounds like he's hyperventilating. He then squeaks out a bark or utters groans as close to talking as he can then starts all over again. I promise we do not ignore Sparky. I try to solve whatever issue is causing him to whine. And sometimes he makes demands that only a crazy or famous person would make. No joke, he woke me up at 3am this morning with his whining. He understands words like "walk", "play", and "chicken" (among other basic commands). He didn't respond to any of those words. I finally broke down four hours of inconsistent sleeping (yes it lasted that long). He just wanted one of us to be awake and pay attention to him at 3 in the morning! Not played with, not fed, not walked . . . just for me to talk, I don't know, stare at him and be awake . . . at 3 am. I can't be the only one who has a dog like this.

We still love him to death though. He has fur that looks like human hair, but feels softer and thicker. He's intuitive. A great guard dog. Has some really cute habits . . . aside from whining. And is generally obedient.

And overall today hasn't been that bad. My mood improved vastly over the hours. We were snowed in and enjoyed popcorn and smores while we caught up on some pretty horrible teen movies we hadn't seen (John Tucker Must Die and The Rocker). I made eggs and bacon for dinner, shoveled two feet of snow off of the long sidewalk that wraps around our apartment, and reorganized my closet. Fun stuff. How was your day?


Michemily said...

Oh my goodness, I decide not to open Google Reader for a few days, and you post a whole slew of posts? So typical. Ha ha. I hope John is better, the snow is awesome, Sparky stopped whining, etc. . .